I Suffer From Constant Mood Swings

I never knew what sort of mood I'd be in when I woke up. Everything could be going fine for me, but I'd be in a terrible mood. On the other hand, I could be dealing with one problem after the other, and I'd be perfectly cheerful.

Quite by chance, very good chance, I met this psychiatrist at a function I had to attend. I almost ducked out of it, but I'm very glad I didn't. He was a very pleasant, approachable man, and I asked whether I could have some free advice. He said he'd be delighted to help, so I asked him why I suffered from constant mood swings.

He told me that it could be blood sugar or my hormones going a bit wild, and he asked me how long this moodiness had been going on. I told him really as long as I could remember. He told me that dealing with stress over a long period would cause moodiness and unless something was done about it, then it would become a habit. But you can change your mood so that it's much better and evens out. But it's like anything else you want. You must work for it.

He told me that too many people simply accepted their moods, that there was no way to change them so they might as well accept them. Well this isn't the case. Knowing what mood you're in helps considerably. Are you angry? Do you feel someone has insulted you? Pretending you don't feel angry or insulted does you no good at all.

Take it a stage further, though. Why are you angry? Be specific. I'm angry because that woman was unpleasant to my wife. Fine. Just because she was unpleasant to your wife, doesn't mean you have to clip your son round the ear! He hasn't done anything. So contain your anger. You're angry at one specific person. Don't take it out on other people.

Unfortunately, there are people who always seem angry or sad. This is because they've just allowed a mood to overcome them, without bothering to quell it or do something about it.

A psychologist at Stanford University, professor Zajong, asked himself that why, when we become emotional, do we change our facial expressions? Imagine you're crying or very angry. Apparently, the differences are caused by the way the blood flows to your face for one thing, but also to your brain.

When we're deep in thought, we tend to frown, which drives the blood from the face to the brain, thereby helping concentration. The other thing he discovered was that different facial expressions can alter the temperature of the brain. This, really, is the answer to the question as to why different expressions can make you feel better or worse.

Our brains heat up when we frown, because we narrow our nostrils, and don't feel so good. On the other hand, if we smile or say the letter 'E', this cools the brain and we feel better. I'd suggest you retire to the bathroom to do the smiling exercise, which should take about thirty seconds.

Eight Risks of Being Angry

Harming the liver

When being angry, people will secrete a kind of "catecholamine" which will act on the central nervous system, causing increased blood glucose, strengthened fatty acid decomposition and increased toxins in the blood and liver cells.

Suggestion: When being angry, drink a glass of water. Water can promote the discharging of body free fatty acid and reduce the toxins.

Inducing splashes on the skin

When being angry, the blood will rush to the head, so the blood oxygen will reduce, toxins will increase. And toxins can stimulate hair follicle, causing different degrees of inflammation. Thus, splashes will occur.

Suggestion: When facing the unpleasant things, do deep breath with both hands uplifting to adjust the body state and expel the toxins.

Accelerating the aging of brain cells

A large number of blood flowing to the brain will increase the pressure on cerebrovascular vessels. The toxins content in the blood is the highest and oxygen content the least.

Suggestion: When facing the unpleasant things, do deep breath with both hands uplifting to adjust the body state and expel the toxins.

Gastric ulcer

Anger will cause sympathetic excitement, and directly act upon the heart and blood vessels. Gastrointestinal blood flow will decrease and peristalsis will be slow and the appetite will be reduced. If the case is serious, gastric ulcer may appear.

Suggestion: Massaging on the stomach every day to alleviate the discomforts.

Myocardial ischemia

A large amount of blood flows to the brain and the face will reduce the heart blood supply and cause myocardial ischemia. Heart, in order to satisfy the body needs, will work harder. So there will be irregular heartbeats which can be deadly.

Suggestion: try to smile, and recall the pleasant things, can make the beating of the heart restore and blood flow tends to be uniform.

Hyperthyroidism

Anger will cause endocrine disorder, increase the thyroid hormone secretion and cause hyperthyroidism if the condition continues.

Suggestion: Relax, sit down, close your eyes, do deep breaths.

Harming the lungs

When one gets emotional and impulsive, the breathing will be in a hurry and there will appear hyperventilation phenomenon. Alveolar will constantly keep expanding and there is no time for contraction. So there won't be enough relaxation and rest thus the health of the lungs will be affected.

Suggestion: Focus and do deep and slow breathing for 5 times.

Damaging the immune system

When being angry, the brain will command the body to manufacture a kind of cortex sterol that is transformed by cholesterol. If this kind of material is accumulated inside body too much, it will hinder the action of immune cells and lower the body's immunity.

Suggestion: Recall the good thing that you have done as far as possible to calm the mind.

Welcome to The Broadmoor!

There seems to be a never-ending supply of "bad" customer service stories to share here each month, so when a good story comes along, it's cause for celebration-at least it gives an opportunity to demonstrate how to do something right instead of cautioning about what not to do.

Your Room Number is 4238...

I just got back from speaking at a very important conference that was being held at The Broadmoor, a wonderful historic property in Colorado Springs. I had an after­noon flight with a connection in Atlanta that got me to the hotel at around 8:30 pm Mountain Time, which was 10:30 pm on my time.

The front-desk clerk was courte­ous and professional, and handed me a map of the resort, a room key, and a folder with Room 4238 highlighted.

She offered to have the bell man assist me with my bags (not neces­sary, thank you) and then pointed me in the direction of the elevator.

Knock Knock! Who's There?

You can imagine my concern when I arrived at Room 4238... and found a "Do Not Disturb" sign on the door.

I figured it would be prudent to see if someone was actually in the room before using my key, so, throwing caution to the wind and ignoring the sign, I knocked on the door.

My response was the sound of a dog barking, followed, a minute later, by the door opening. I was greeted by a woman holding a small dog, and looking puzzled about who I was and why I was knocking on her door-the door that had the "Do Not Disturb" sign.

I apologized and showed her the folder that had that very room number clearly written in the "your room" section.

Embarrassed, I apologized again, and headed back down­stairs to the front desk to get this straightened out.

Oops-We Made a Mistake!

It turns out that the front-desk clerk was suffering from a minor attack of dyslexia-my room wasn't 4238; it was 4328!

As they say in basketball, "no harm, no foul," so I settled in to my room, unpacked, and got some much-needed sleep.

The next morning, though, I started thinking about the situ­ation, and I became a little con­cerned. For example, what would have happened if the woman hadn't had the "Do Not Disturb" sign on the door? I would have walked right on in, and created a scene that would have been uncomfortable at best!

So I went to the front desk and asked to see a manager. A few min­utes later, Sasha (pronounced "say-sha") Burke appeared and listened to what had happened. Much to my relief, she assured me that my key wouldn't have opened the door to the first room, since it was a simple transposition error that had sent me there in the first place.

She apologized for the inconve­nience, and invited me to contact her directly if there was anything I needed during my stay.

Need a Little Snack?

The situation was handled professionally, so I went about my business and didn't give it a second thought.

When I returned to my room, though, there was a surprise wait­ing for me: a bottle of wine and a tin with some dessert treats!

Then I saw the flashing light on the phone, and pressed the "Mes­sage" button. There was a message from Ann Alba, the hotel's general manager, adding her own apol­ogy, letting me know that they had sent the gift items, and leaving her direct cell-phone number in case anything else came up.

So I'm beginning to enjoy this not because of the treats, but (1) because of the way in which this service-recovery opportunity was being addressed, and (2) because the general manager was aware of the problem and had reached out personally.

But Wait... There's More!

The next morning, as I was walking across the property on my way to the main building, I hap­pened to pass Sasha who was walk­ing in the opposite direction.

I smiled and said, "Good morn­ing!" And without missing a beat, she said, "Oh, hello Mr. Rosenberg; how are you today?" Yes, that's right, she remembered my name, even though she had no idea that she would see me then-or even at all during the remainder of my stay.

And just in case you think this was just a fluke, she passed me later in the day at a reception the conference was hosting, and greeted me by name again.

Problem? No Problem!

Mistakes are going to happen, especially when there are lots of "moving parts," as in the case of a large resort property.

But the way in which these missteps are handled can make the difference between a potential disaster and a raving fan.

In fact, some studies have shown that if the "baseline" level of customer loyalty is at, say 90%, when a problem occurs and is handled quickly, effectively, and professionally, then the level of loyalty actually increases.

I Have Nothing to Worry About!

If you think about this for a minute, it will make perfect sense. You have in mind a certain set of expectations; but when there's a problem, you discover that the vendor will go above and beyond to make it right. This provides a level of reassurance that if on the rare occasion something does go wrong, you know you'll be taken care of.

In case you were wondering, the next night, after my presentation, I was greeted in my room by some hand-made chocolates, and two small bottles of Grand Marnier.

Taxi Please!

When you travel as much as I do, you develop an appreciation for the "rhythms" of certain travel processes.

I know when a flight is going to start boarding because certain ac­tivities start happening in a definite sequence in the gate area.

I can tell when a flight is go­ing to be delayed when I'm sitting on the plane at the gate because something just doesn't "seem right" although I can't usually identify exactly what it is.

When I land at most airports-whether at my final destination or at a connecting hub-I can almost always "guess" the right direction to take to the ground-transportation area or to my connecting flight.

Time to Go to the Airport...

My travel rituals are "refined" to the point where I know what I can and can't wear through the metal detector, where I can find a healthy snack in most airports, and what time I have to leave home or my hotel to have enough time to safely make my flight.

In some cities, this time varies depending on what time of day it is-if I'm taking a late-afternoon flight, I have to leave extra time to allow for rush-hour traffic.

If I'm taking an early - morning flight, this usually isn't a problem. And if it's an airport I'm already fa­miliar with, as is the case with most major US locations, I have it down to a near-science.

So a 6:00 am flight from Las Vegas back home to Raleigh should have been a piece of cake.

Wake up at 4:00 am, 30 minutes to get ready and packed, 25 min­utes to the airport, and I'm there a little more than an hour before departure time.

Since the hotel shuttle wasn't running that early, I inquired the night before about getting a taxi. I should point out that this hotel was in a somewhat outlying part of town, not on "The Strip" where you can get a taxi literally any time of the day or night.

The front-desk clerks were very helpful and explained that I should call when I'm leaving my room in the morning and the bell desk would have a taxi ready and waiting by the time I got to the front lobby.

It Should Have Taken One Call...

Taking her at her word, I called at around 4:25 am as I was prepar­ing to head downstairs, and pro­ceeded down to the lobby.

When I got there ten minutes later (my room was at the far end of the hotel) I expected to walk right out and see my taxi.

When it wasn't there, I asked the bellman outside to check on it for me. He came out a minute later and said there were none parked at the curb, but they had called and one should be there in a few minutes.

When ten, and then 15 minutes had passed with no sign of a taxi anywhere, I went inside myself to find out what was going on.

The other bellman said he had called, but it could be another 15-20 minutes before it arrived. When I told him about the instruc­tions the front-desk clerk had given me the night before, he grimaced, hesitated, and said, "Um, that's not really correct."

Can I Start Getting Nervous Now?

Sensing my unease with this, he asked what time my flight was. When I told him, he asked me to wait outside for a minute and then went back behind the front desk.

Two minutes later, he emerged from the front doors holding a set of keys, and directing me towards a large SUV parked at the curb.

He said, "There's no way you're going to get there in time if we wait for the taxi to come, so I went in and got permission to take the company van and drive you there myself."

It Pays to Do the Right Thing!

He loaded up my bags, and headed out on the nearly deserted highway to deliver me to the termi­nal door.

The line at security was running a bit slowly (why do they insist on training new people at peak de­parture times?) but I made it to the gate with about 15 minutes to spare, and made my upgrade as a bonus.

There are times when lapses in communication and errors in the process create situations that are neither appropriate nor acceptable from the customer's perspective.

Soothing Anger by Mindful Prayer

"For as pressing milk produces curds,
and pressing the nose produces blood,
so pressing anger produces strife."
~Proverbs 30:33 (NRSV)

Created, as we are, in the image of God, we all have the capacity for anger. And although our anger is not as perfect as God's anger is - the Divine sense of righteous indignation - we are often provoked for the right reasons. The trouble is, however, when we push our anger too far, or we don't rally our resources and process the anger, we inevitably end up in strife; and others are violated.

RECONCILING ANGER WITHIN REASON

It's a good thing to act as an agent for ourselves; to be able to attend to ourselves by validating the causes of our anger. This is an internal working model.

When we can take what is occurring within ourselves, that which is causing frustration, inner contempt, or derision, and actually notice it, consciously, we are able to quell the anger.

But when we allow angry feelings to boil, pressing our anger further, our anger no doubt spills over.

Not pressing our anger is about the choice and discipline of mindfulness.

Mindfulness this way isn't necessarily easy to achieve; it must become a habit of thinking in ways where we are consciously present and conscious each moment. Whilst we will have lapses from time to time, mindfulness is a discipline that we can all develop. And there is no better process to augment mindfulness than prayer.

JOURNEYING INTO MINDFULNESS THROUGH THE CONSCIOUSNESS OF PRAYER

This is God's invitation to each of us: that, via prayer, we may become thoroughly more conscious of what is occurring around us and inside us as the precedence for our emotional reaction.

Prayer is not just something that we engage in within a quiet room, with eyes closed, and with hands clenched together. Prayer is better seen in the light of constantly communicating with God, by being in touch with our mindful selves.

When we pray in ways that enables God to speak to us, through what is going on within us regarding our world, we receive much more control over our emotions.

***

Managing anger is helped by conscious mindfulness, which is made possible through prayer - a constant and ongoing conversation with God. When we are in touch with the Spirit of God, and we are constantly seeking him before we proceed, our anger is neither pressed too far nor is it noticed as much by other people.

When anger is pushed too far it becomes violence. But, anger is eased when we pray. As the emotions begin to boil, we simply need to pray; to connect our situation, and our feelings, with God.